Whatever Happened to Censorship?

You get an Amen! from me.  It hurts the ears and heart when I hear our little kids referring to their friends and family as B's and N's and so on.  I think you hit on the reason when you stated that profanity is rude, vulgar, unattractive and impolite.  Impolite being a key factor.  The use of profanity is a learned behavior and within the past 10 years our societal and family norms have diminished so much that children are very seldom taught to be polite, to be corrected and receive appropriate negative consequences for adverse behavior.  One could state that children will be children and their behavior amongst peers may be different than when adults are present.  However, I have been present around groups of 8 to 10 year old children who have no shame when it comes to cursing and if I attempt to correct them, they will curse me as well.  We as parents and teachers must  model the behavior we expect from our youth, if not many in our society will not grow to be productive, self sufficient human beings.  That will be a great loss.
Joyce

I've had 2 recent occassions to ponder this very subject.  While I might easily give you an Amen as well, part of the very meaning of the word censorship is repulsive to me.  One value I can't seem to rationalize away is total freedom of speech.  Only when we can hear the words (whatever they may be) of others and match them with their actions can we get a true view of where they are in their journey, at what level they operate and how to interact or inspire them.  That and I'm a wee bit fiesty about no one telling me what to say or not say so I have to support that in others as well.

One thing as a parent I am becoming more aware of is that many people blame the language of young ones on media.  While I could probably agree that would play a small part, I would probably like to argue more it is from family that they learn their value of language.

We discussed it in a pod called Parenting Instruction Manual in one thread.  I also had time to reflect on it and discuss it with my son while visiting local playgrounds and witnessing the language used by kids other than my son.  If you fight being appalled and try to use a little understanding and view the individuals using the profanity with compassion I find that both my son and I learn life and people lessons.

In this day where many things are desensitizing many of us, it is quite challenging to discourage a disagreed language when the desensitized don’t seem to have a problem with it. As a parent, you cannot simply tell your children “no” when they are simply over-whelmed by various languages they hear via the media, music, their peers and even us as guilty parents when having spirited moment.

I believe you can guide children by setting yourself as an example. You can help them understand times and places when something is or is not appropirate. Profanity can be inapporpriate in a type of setting with a type of group of people and perfectly ok for another setting and a type a group of people. Through this guidance you give the children room to learn, understand, grow and shape their own characteristics and value systems.

You will never rid completely what you disagree with. So far, we have not been successful ridding the world of roaches, for example. However you can encourage when and where behaviors are acceptable. The outcome is this child, this being will grow up with his value system to understand that and for some, profanity laced behavior is not suitable for them.

Yes, profanity is rampant.  Speaking of censorship, whatever happened the the American Press?  They now seem under right wing control and they squelch all news that doesn't fit the current regime's 'vision' of the world, a vision of fascism for all.

I am sorry I am using your blog as a soapbox.  Censorship was the catch word for me.

Peace.

Words are symbols. They have meaning. Unfortunately for many, they do not know the meanings of words. Quite often because of such a limited vocabulary, the words in common usage are usually degrading.  I read the books that you read. You have a reference book, the Webster's Dictionary. If everyone would simply use a reference book like that, you could convey anything you intend to communicate in words in a more sensible manner than turning to words that restimulate negativity in the minds of people.

Good Topic.

Children are not responsible what they do. We the adults need to be an examble to them. Upbringing reflects the home. I have observed also children are exposed to a lot of media, they do follow their parents ways. I belive education starts in the home.

John :
Thanks so much for your topic of censorship. I am and aboriginal from Canada and everyone once n a while i hear my nieces or nephews using that kind of language and I find that simple communication with them puts a stop to it in a big hurry. People forget how to communicate with each other even in discipline. I dont mean discipline in a  negative sense but in the “learning and teaching sense” In our language a word  for discipline means literally to hold something up to the light” I believe that we must hold up to the light what we believe requires censure. Thanks I have enjoyed reading your ideas. I have just recently joined Zaadz and I am very happy that I found your blog it has inspired me to continue reading other blogs and to find out more about this site. Thanks and I hope you continue to find your muses that will inspire your writing and purpose on this site. Thanks Jeanine

um…. I like profanity, sometimes. I'm not generally a vulgar person, but I'm not a prude either. Occasionally a dirty word gives us that thereputic release that might otherwise turn into violence. Sometimes it gives us that extra little bit of passionate emphasis we need to adequately express ourselves. I don't think I believe in censorship the same way you do. There should definately be censorship when it comes to children, and we should definately not use profanity around them or allow them to use it, but I don't believe adult radio/tv chanels or movies should be censored. I'm a much bigger believer in parents censoring what their children are exposed to, but I do think parents need to do a much better job at it.

Wanda is a bit of an idealist.  It's impossible to keep kids from being exposed to the stuff on TV these days.  Even if the parents do a good job, the parents of their friends don't and the kids pick it up anyway.  People like Howard Stern should be censored.  If it were up to me, we'd go back to living like Amish do today.  It would be a much better world. 

Censorship is about discipline, many U.S. citizents today have forgotten that.  That is one reason why we are wasting time in Iraq, and elected a foolish President.  TWICE!!!   No discipline.

I agree that it is a question of discipline. If parents don't have discipline, neither will the children.
At the heart of it all though, is a lack of self knowledge. When you realize who you truly are, then all sorts of unexamined behavior becomes obvious to you and you find the desire and the will to stop. That's when you become conscious. That's when you start to understand that it is all up to you, that you are the only one. and nothing will change if you don't.
Morality come out of the depth of the soul. Of course we need rules and regulations to live in society. But we have to bring the light of consciousness to our soulless society if we want things to change.
Danielle

I got this handy little email that told me someone else commented on a blog I had commented on so I came to see if might merit a response from me. I think it sort of does, since I've been called an idealist. I think that's a misinterpretation. I'm not really an idealist, I'm more of a realist with principals. True, it's (almost) impossible to keep kids from seeing what's on TV, but it's (almost) impossible to keep kids from hearing profanity coming out of the mouths of 12/13 year old punks at Walgreens… Adolescent punks whose parents probably only gave them advice like “abstinance, not condoms!” and “PG13 only! because that way I don't have to adress the fact that you'll undoubtedly hear profanity all over the place regardless and need to know how to deal with it.” God help you if you raise your kids like the Amish and then expect them to be able to function in the real world without becoming crack headed prostitutes. Kids need to be prepared for what they'll be exposed to when you're not around and know how to deflect the bad behavior they'll be pressured to emmulate. People are violent, use profanity, have premarital sex, drink, smoke and do drugs… How long do you really think you can hide it from them? If you don't want them to take part the only way you can prevent it is to spend time instiling the right things in them and less time trying to censor things made for adults.

well spoken….these words are a physcial manifestation of the accumulated energies of fear lack doubt and dark…in every language in every situation they may mean what they mean, what they vibrate out into the Universe every time, is seperation from the Light of All There Is…a very slippery slope…i send YOU LOVE Light and Perfect Peace…

Lets go back to the time when we too were little kids and reflect on how we were effected by our sorroundings. When I was a kid I personally detested from using profane language, even though I used to hear my friends use it. Now I use it under my breath when I am under some stress. And it does relieve me quite a bit. Then I utter the words 'cancel' a few times imagining the words I just uttered to be wiped out from the ethers. I am back to normal again.

Now I can't help if something profane appears at the tip of my tongue - I have to let it out. But no one else comes to know of it and it is cleared before the vibrations start effecting the ethers. It's like cleaning up the place where you have just puked.

Kids are not to be blamed just like the wide animals are not to be blamed for hunting, killing and eating meat!

Lets look deep inside of ourself and reflect on our own shortcomings. If you are embarrassed when you hear a kid uttering profanities or indulging in some sinful act, take a moment to reflect on what your contribution must have been to create this situation.

As it has been said, “You cannot pluck a flower without trembling a star!” We are all interconnected, and whatever prevails today, remember, we have also contributed our mite - whether positive or negative!

You are a very sensible person, John and no doubt, as sensible people, we should never endorse the propagation of profanity in society.

But we also need to accept that, in these times of man-made stress, profanity is a linguistic pressure release system; it keeps us from silently exploding with the seething, unvoiced rage that builds up within ourselves under certain conditions.

Personally, I grew up with a mild loathing to any sort of bad language. Even college failed to unshackle my mind-set, as I continued to stand firm against the forceful gratification of a slackened tongue.

Yet, I do give vent to my feelings in private. But most of my wrath is directed at inanimate objects, anyway; objects that appear to amuse themselves by mocking my incompetence, such as the lousy computer software, and other such stuff of the Devil himself. Excluding such offences, I have never ever made an effort to pollute the air around a human being.

The way I see it, the overuse of vulgar language is a kind of an offensive on the sensibilities of those who are present at that inopportune moment to hear it. Without doubt, profanity kills innocence and disrobes the language and eliminates any sense of refinement. However, it does help to inflict our will on others, and this partly explains its widespread popularity.

Conscious people need to understand that there's a time to let it out and there's a time to hold our horses. So even teens cannot be blamed; theirs is an age when the adrenalin runs high and if there is no proper outlet, vulgarity sets in. This is the case with us so called adults too!

But censorship is not the answer!

Meditation is. Introspection is. Self awareness is. But such things cannot be taught.

Absolutely, John, absolutely and wholeheartedly too!
:)

Where I live, it is so totally the norm. Most of the community's children start cursing as soon as they can talk at all. Know what bugs me? They even have potties now that say swear words when the child does the biz. How's that for a kick? I agree with you and wish more parents would not find things like that funny. When my son was young I pretty much ignored an acassional slip of the toungue because when they get too much attention for it they're likely to make it a frequent happening. Kids love attention no matter if it's for something good or bad. I guess it can only be taken care of one parent and one child at a time. More people have to be good role models and discourage it.

I agree on some of the things that have been said here. Education is the key word. Explain your kids what the words mean. Observe with them. Sit on the couch and watch MTV together. Although it can be toe curling… this is what it is. By closing our eyes and just censor our kids, we won’t get any further. Teens are exploring their freedom, their excistance, their body (what the bleep is happening to me??).
They are distinguishing themselves from their parents and their friends. Language, body language is the most important tool they use!! The more we censor them, the more attractive it becomes!!
We censored the Beatles and Elvis for their ‘profanity’..
Please try not only to see the negative effect of it. Stand next to our children en stay calm.
Show them the opposite of the obsenity..
My son once found the www.f*ck.com website. (yeah, I said it.. ;-)) He is only 9 years old. I explained him that, yes, that is sex. But no, it is not the way people usually connect. I mentioned him the lack of love and sensere feelings between porn actors while doing their thing. I did not forbid him anything. But he never got back to these kind of websites. At least…hahahaha.
In my classroom some of the kids try it.. They say something outloud, to shock me. Mostly I repeat the word and smile at them with a certain look in my eyes Not shocked…but they know exactly what I mean! I’m not amused, I’m not shocked.
I once explained them:
When you receive a gift from a person with good intentions, you usually accept it and unwrap the package, it’s nice when someone thinks about you :)
A curse or something that would hurt you can be handled in the same way. By NOT accepting it. Just give it back with a ‘no, thank you’ and let go. It remains with the giver, who has to deal with it himself. I bet, what’s ‘in his hands’ becomes useless..

Again, education, safety, awareness and involvement is the key. Censorship is not.
My 2 cents..

Educating the mind
without educating the heart
is no education at all.
- Seneca

“As a teacher, I have learned that adults must do more than stand by as children learn and use profanity, but that we must speak to youth about the meaning of the word profane and what it means to incorporate it in regular, everyday speech. ”

You are absolutely right about that one, that is education. And actually I think we are pretty much on one line.
You don’t want people to tape the childrens mouth. I don’t want people to have a laissez-faire attitude.
It is about balance between trust and protection.
When I gave you the example of my son. I trusted the idea that he understood, but still was aware and checked internet-history. That is what I mean by ‘standing next. or by” (english). Actually it was ment as coaching. We should coach our children..

Blessings,
Ellen

What a valuable conversation!

Ellen, your quote from Seneca is right on. In Chinese medicine, the mind is said to reside IN the heart. While the brain may act as a storage and processing organ, the seat of identity, self-expression and psyche is within the heart.

Words
and more importantly, the energy behind them,

have power.

They influence our personal vibration. For me, the key is: what qualities do I want to BE? What qualities do I want to resonate in my own vibration?

Profanity, gossip, demorilzing words… not what I consider good vibes. Not who I want to BE.

John, I like your idea of self-censorship: it’s a function of healthy self-esteem. I choose not to vibrate with this negative quality. - and by doing so, I become empowered.

But imposing censorship on others often creates the allure of forbidden fruit. Limitations spark rebellion, which in itself has degrees of cool that society tends to champion.

Kids are drawn to fashion. They want to feel like they fit in and are receiving approval. They love to be loved and admired and sought out among their peers and family. They’re hungry for instruction and example.

It’s more effective to rmake it unpopular; to take the buzz out. Something adults have lord over when it comes to choices made in the music and entertainment industries. Right now, the message is: it’s cool to talk crazy and loose, slinging profanity around. But we can change the message easily by filling in the space with something more cool and making the existing “norm” look dull: Hey, it’s just not sexy when you talk that way. I’m not interested. It turns me off, actually. You’re less interesting to me when you talk that way. Yawn. Big yawn.

If we can create an environment in which profanity is uncool, we’re winning. Take the fashion out of the equation; make the opposite fashionable. Censoring has the opposite effect, in most cases, because it becomes the thing to rebel against. Though we need to lead by example, which requires self-censoring, we don’t have to imprison their choices to achieve beneficial change.

Once we’ve defined what’s NOT cool, what’s not attractive, we have to back it up by praising and celebrating and actively promoting what IS.

Crowd the space in their hearts
with loving, empowered examples
and leave no room for junk to thrive.
Fill their minds with positives
and shine loudly and proudly
on what brings you alive.

Then trust their true nature to come through.

AAHHHH A man after my own heart! I have been saying the same thing for ages ….

We wonder why crime, sadism, violence is so prevalent i all societies today? Look at what our children are growing up with … sex, nudity, violence, disrespect, too much freedom and not sufficient discipline …. it is anarchy in the making!

South Africa has just passed a new law that states that a child of 12 may apply to have an abortion without the parent's consent …. what is this world coming to? I am horrified! At 12 I was not even aware of my whole body, let alone sex, drugs and all the rest ….

Why will the “power's that be” not see that by giving so much freedom and by not censoring anything, and then also not allowing any kind of discipline, the children of today are turning into the monsters of tomorrow ~ and we are creating them!

I pray for the innocence of our children and for the return of sanity where children are children and adults take responsibility as to what they are or are not allowed to do/see/watch/play etc.

Love 'n Light
LightSpirit

Those who wish to change the World
According with their desire
Cannot succeed.

The World is shaped by the Way;
It cannot be shaped by Self.
If one tries to shape it, one damages it;
If one tries to possess it, one loses it.

Therefore:
Sometimes things flourish,
And sometimes they do not.
Sometimes life is hard
And sometimes it is easy.
Sometimes people are strong
And sometimes they are weak.
Sometimes you get where you are going
And sometimes you fall by the way.

The sage is not extreme, extravagant, or complacent.

Who are you to tell me or anyone else how they should speak or limit their speech? However, I'm glad that you do not call for any action by government to censor speech, only ourselves.

jt

Profanity is an adult perogative, not a childs.  I am not offended in any way by profanity but I AM offended hearing a child use profane words. 

I prefer to dwell in an adult world.  Adults sometimes use profanity and oftentimes, to good reason.

To me, John blurred the line with his post between adult behavior and what is acceptable child's behavior. 

Where are the adults and why aren't these children being parented?

S

Oh absolutely Soozi. “Show me the parents” I always say, and PARENTS need to exercize MUCH more control over kids….

Remember the old days when an adult would come up to you when you were misbehaving and say “I KNOW YOUR FATHER!!”

uh…oh….

We don't DO that anymore!

I DO……I hear a kid cursing I say something. I see a kid littering he's gonna go pick it up.

But “whatever happened to censorship” like it's nostalgic? Like “What ever happened to Cherry Lime Rickeys?”

We need MUCH MUCH less censorship in the adult world.

I just read some maintenance guy at a school got arrested for singing a “Guns N' Roses” song over the school P/A system……the book “Catcher in the Rye” has been banned from many schools in the south…….

MORE Censorship??? Yeah, and let's go back to that fun old wife beating too!!

I know I know…….we're talking about kids….

What I tell them is “You know, if you end up sounding vulgar in life, people will see you as vulgar.”